Augustine of Hippo

We would falter when the persecutor is present if the comforter were absent. And because the strength to endure or some relief from life's burdens for necessary ministry did not come from themselves, see what he said: "I make known to you, brothers, the affliction that came upon us in Asia, that we were burdened exceedingly, beyond our strength." That affliction surpassed human strength: did it also surpass divine help? He said, "We were burdened beyond measure, beyond our strength." How much beyond strength? See that he speaks of the strength of the soul: "So that we despaired even of life." How burdened was the Apostle by the multitude of oppressions that he, whom love urged to live, was wearied of life! How love impelled him to live, that love of which he says elsewhere: "But to remain in the flesh is necessary for your sakes." Behold, such a great persecution had increased, and such a tribulation, that he despaired even of life. Behold, fear and trembling came upon him, and darkness covered him, as you heard when it was said in the Psalm. For it is the voice of the body of Christ, the voice of the members of Christ. Do you wish to recognize your own voice there? Be a member of Christ. "Fear," he says, "and trembling fell upon me, and darkness covered me. And I said: Who will give me wings like a dove? And I will fly and be at rest." Does it not seem that the Apostle said this when he said: "So that we despaired even of life"? He somehow suffered weariness from the snare of the flesh; he wished to fly to Christ; the abundance of tribulations beset his path but did not block it. He was weary of life, but not in that eternal life, of which he says: "For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain." But since he was held here by love, what follows? "But if to live in the flesh means fruitful labor for me, then I do not know which I prefer. I am hard-pressed between the two: having a desire to depart and be with Christ." Who will give me wings like a dove? "But to remain in the flesh is necessary for your sakes." He yielded to his whispering fledglings; he covered them with outspread wings, he nursed the fledglings, as he himself said: "I became small in your midst, like a nurse caring for her children."